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Friday, January 21, 2011

I wore a velveteeen blazer. I describe a bitter internal debate. That is all.

True confession time: I have not always been a fan of the blazer. Blazers always felt so... complicated. For one, they seemed too tailored for my stressful day job of doing laundry, wiping up my twins' fourteen millionth apple juice spill, and creating flying vehicles out of Legos. I couldn't imagine wearing a blazer to the playground, or throwing one on with my leggings for a trip to the supermarket. I also blame my strained relationship with blazers on too many viewings of the movie Working Girl. Over time, I've begun to associate blazers with linebacker shoulder pads, teased hair, and white sneakers with pantyhose. Let's face it - I was never going to be a New Jersey secretary desperately angling to be a high-powered executive while bedding Harrison Ford, so clearly blazers were not for me.

A couple of years ago, I was killing time before preschool pick-up when I found myself browsing in TJ Maxx. I was thumbing through racks of sweaters when my fingers brushed against the softest, thickest velveteen. Allow me to describe the point-by-point conversation I had with myself following this discovery:

Oooh. What have we here? Is that velveteen???
*squeal!* Yes! A Juicy Couture velveteen blazer!
Hello lover. Come to mama.
But it's a blazer.
You fear blazers.
But it's so pretty! And soft! And has delicate antique lace detailing at the cuffs!
Hello, it's a blazer. A blazer.
*eyeroll*
Where will you wear it? You just spent an hour scraping dried bananas off the floor.
Honey, you are just not the blazer type. 
And that color. Seriously, you won't know what to do with it.
But...it looks like something that came from Anthropologie! (which, let's face it, is the predominant criteria I use when deciding on a purchase.)
AND it's $250 off full price. 
AND you should know that if I do not buy this blazer some unsavory girl will walk away with it and I WILL DIE. And WHEN I DIE my husband will coldly bag up all my clothes and dump them at the Goodwill and I JUST CAN'T LIVE WITH THAT, IT'S NOT RIGHT. 
*uncomfortable silence*
I'll figure out how to wear it. I know I will.
Well, fine. Go ahead and buy it. Don't say I didn't warn you. *stomps off in a huff*

Buy it I did. I proudly took it home, hung it on a padded hanger...and didn't wear it until today. That damm blazer cursed me in the store. The color proved to be troublesome, and it's blazer-ness intimidated me. But thanks to my helpful, inspirational list of blogs, I've learned not to be afraid of structured pieces. Blazers don't need to be stiff and pointy-shouldered and accessorized with teased bangs and pantyhose and New Jersey accents. They can be soft, and worn almost anywhere, with nearly anything in my closet.


In conclusion, I feel pretty great in my blazer today. Even while fighting urges to chain smoke and kick Sigourney Weaver's ass, that is. 

Juicy Couture blazer; Citizens of Humanity jeans; thrifted Gap floral button-down; Gap white tee; Gap belt; J Crew booties